Actually, I got a couple.
An Unusual Awakening
Many of you have experiences of canines; experiences which are quite different from mine. (Canine as in canis lupus, better known as Dog. Only in my case, it was canis latrans, better known as Coyote.)
My friend Nick was there, nose almost touching my face. (For those who let their Dogs sleep on the bed, this may be a somewhat customary experience. In my case, no!)
Talk about waking up with a shock! And the worst case of "spring breath" I've smelled in years! He hasn't been eating well.
So I screamed, "Nick! What are you doing! Are you trying to scare me to death!"
Nick apologized, saying he was just checking to see if I was awake. I assured him that I was. Now.
After I got over my shock, I mentioned I as feeling hungry. Nick looked askance.
"Don't worry, old friend," I said. "I won't eat you. I had something about the size of a Squirrel in mind. Nothing too big for my first meal."
Nick understood that; he nodded his head.
"So what's it like outside?" I asked, because my cave did not appear to be too bright.
"Well," said Nick, "not so great. Check it out for yourself."
And so I did. Scramble. Crawl. Pull myself to the door.
Snout out. Which led to my second surprise.
Cold. Actually snowing, blowing, and cold!
"Nick," I bellowed, "why didn't you warn me?"
Nick was non-plussed.
He replied, "You've got a heavy Bearskin coat; I've only got a Dog coat. Obviously things are going to feel different for you than for me. So I thought you could decide for yourself what it's like."
Now, Nick is pretty bright; I'll give him that. And he's kind and helpful, despite your image of a Coyote. But his social skills are — how can I put this nicely — in need of considerable refinement.
"You woke me up for nothing," I said, as I crawled back into bed." I'm waiting for Spring."
"But today is the first day of Spring," he replied. "I thought you would feel it in your bones."
No Nick, wrong again.
I pondered the situation a bit and finally said, "I'm going to try to get back into hibernation. It doesn't feel like spring out there, at all." I think I sounded a bit cross.
Nick paused for a moment. I knew he had something on his mind. He has this certain look. Probably going to ask for a scrap of food, though there's nothing here.
"Um, well, if you're going back into hibernation, can I stay and sleep here for a bit? I'm sure your Bearskin coat would be nice and warm."
About what I expected. Bear and Coyote sharing a bed. Think Lion and Lamb. Well, OK; not so much.
"Whatever," I said and rolled over. Nick snuggled up against my back.
But it's so late, I wonder if I'll get back into hibernation mode. Especially with a Coyote sleeping beside me. Good grief; a canine on my bed.